Wednesday, October 31
even my new soft toy, Raf ( that's his name ) is curious of what i am studying... bored... *yawnz*
Lunch of the Day
muahaha... :)
busy busy... even though, i am also not slacking... :( *back ache from sitting in one position too long*
[just loooveee the clear pics that i took nowadays...]
lazy to post some overdue pics on my bloggie... :(
Monday, October 29
EWWW!! Double EWW!! saw this when i was printing notes at home... wonder where it came from... quickly went to grab some tissue and threw it over the window.... :( better dun come back again...
another gloomy day... at least the weather is not changing too frequently... :)
haha i not making sense le...
Sunday, October 28
an emo day yest resulted in me waking up with damn puffy eyes... :( feels really like crap but overall, it feels better le... just that with the puffy eyes, there might be some discomfort in continuing my assignment...
i need constant reminder on the current situation... so will anyone just reminds me once every now and then... thanks!
back to 407 assignment... :S
Saturday, October 27
finally cleared all the rubbish that was sitting on my desk! now i can use my table for studying le! hahaha... also changed some of the postcards on my wall... :P
another emo day for me... gt emo after i woke up... also dun know why... *must be strong, must be strong* that's what i keep telling myself... in the end, not so emo after watching a bit of my fav drama... :) also thanks to kerry for listening to my rubbish every now and then... now better le... must endure! :)
0
a pleasent surprise from a fren...
Thanks! :P
back to the notes... :S
Friday, October 26
just now someone gave me encouragement again... i was touched... i also dun know why... i guess it's her way of saying it that make me feel touched... "U deserve somone so much better." mayb nt in exact words... but i really appreciated it... but deep down do i really deserve someone better? maybe in turn it is him who deserve someone better... i dun know...
Now i shall listen to them and really let myself off from this vicious cycle! no more self doubting, no more emo moments, i wanna be happy, laugh when i really mean it! i need to be mentally strong in order to do it! :) with so many great frens ard, i know i can do it! ( even though, i taking a bit long...) :)
JIA YOU, CAT! U Can do it!!!
:)
Thursday, October 25
i suppose closure is one of the painful things about relationships that each of us is unwilling to do. either we don’t know how to approach the other party we’d hurt or are hurting, or really, we love living in the world of escapism. admittedly, escaping is the easiest way out, but not for long. from time to time, it comes back to haunt you in varying degrees. but many times, we are just afraid of having to face the other party again; and fear in love, is oftentimes the evildoer, the cause of many heartbreaks, and the prevention of absolving wrongs.
some of us learn to let go, to do a closure with our own injured souls to find our own cure and move on with our lives. it takes time, but it is done ultimately; when it is done, you surprise yourself with how much better you feel, how light your soul feels after the heavy weight of words, which have been pushing you down for so long, are finally lifted. closure is like nipping the bud of a blossoming hate you start to grow for him or her after a failed relationship.
or sometimes, when he or she dies and leaves a hollow in the hearts of his or her beloved.
kop the above paragraph from someone's blog...
is that what you are feeling? i guess i had no way of knowing... really... still feeling confused and insecure...
Wednesday, October 24
shux!!! was supposed to wake up early to study... sigh... but all the late night talking and drinking sessions are not making it any easier to do that... sigh... someone help me kick start my engine??? but at least it was fun talking rubbish and knowing more about frens and having self-control of how much i drink... :) good lessons learnt i tot...
BUT I REALLY NEED TO STUDY!
Tuesday, October 23
it is kind of hurtful to see that you have deleted anything's that related to me on facebook... in that case, y do u even bother adding me on facebook at all? do u even know that what ever you do currently is rather hurting... not wanting to even say hi or talk, avoiding me etc... mayb in a way, u think it's for the best... but no... you are so wrong... it is damn b***** hurtful! if you ever put yourself in my position, then you will know how it feels... i dun understand why things had to come to such a state... the mistake that i made is why do i even bother to check... it is just like slapping myself on the face...
you left me confused, without any explanation... i'm not as clever or understanding as you think... you dun wanna to say before and i dun expect to hear it now... and now u are doing all these rubbish... fine lor... if u wanna things to become even worse, then just continue whatever u are doing...
am just b***** disappointed and pissed...
just submitted my choices for my FYP... i really hope i can get it wor, cos gt someone chose the same project as me... sigh.. the first 2 choices are more or less fixed, mayb i would do some other changes to my other choices... i am so spoiled for choices sia, but i'm scared that i cannot get it... :S hated this feeling of uncertainity...
seems like it's going to be another boring lesson for muscle bio... i hope he dun nag again... if not, it will be a waste of my time again... sigh...
Monday, October 22
*start of intensive mugging*
sigh... it is always that time of the year... exams... :( totally hate it... this time round seem to be even worse... sigh... but i must pick myself up and strive all the way le... last study sem le... cannot lose this chance to pull up my grades!
first, i need to adjust my bio-clock first... cos i gt all morning papers... :(
had kick-boxing today... woah, have to say that i was amazed by the instructor... he really give u a total body workout! but it was fun! i totally love it... i guess i am going to enjoy this a lot! :) i would recommend all to join... but dun ask me for the link ah, i dun have ah... *hee*
*a happier note*
meet up with the spice gang minus away san at Brewerkz on sat... had been a tiring day for me cos of the previous nite's supper hop and the early morning interview which i din pass thr the next round... oh well... there is always a next time... :)
we ate a lot for the night...
that's the starters... looks huge... swear i was half full when i finished this...
my main course... grilled pork loin...
huilin's main course.... steak, medium rare...
jas's main course... baked salmon...
jun's main course... fish and chips...
that's my frens of 10 years... time flies... need to do something wor... 10 years le...
thanks for all the encouragement and listening to me when i was at my lowest point... all of these meant a lot to me... even though we dun meet and talk very often but u guys are always on my mind... we shall make it a point to meet often... so next meeting after exams ah! :) dun forget!
Friday, October 19
can someone just end my misery... it is just too much for me to take le... can anyone pls...
Thursday, October 18
*gut feeling*
never don't trust a gal's gut feeling cos 90% of the time, they are right on the spot...
when you said you dun know how to tell me, i sort of guessed it but i just need confirmation... and confirmation comes today... it sort of sucks to know that... but i really hope that everyone ard me will be happy... one person unhappy better than the rest of the world unhappy, correct? if everyone is happy, then mayb i will feel happier...
mayb i should get away and mayb things will be better for you... you dun need to apologise to me... i'm the one who caused it... i should be the one apologising...
Tuesday, October 16
*feel like crap*
things can changes very frequently... nothing is constant in this world... just feels like crap and irritated today... i guess it is best to just depend on myself and no one else... being dependent on ppl just make one weak... if a blow is directed at you, it takes very long to climb back up... y subject yourself to such pain and misery??
both school and hall life has lost its appeal to me, just dragging myself to do certain things now...
i am so going to screw this sem up...
Saturday, October 13
*broke!*
met up with KY for late lunch... was so peiseh... cos i woke up late then everything gt pushed back... before meeting him, i was supposed to make a trip back to NTU to get the charger for my hp... without it, i cannot trade in sia... :S
so i was late in meeting him... went to clarke quay to eat ramen... hehe... i ate the black pig shabushabu ramen... haha... so nice! worth everyone going there to eat... :P there was this dessert that was very very nice! Orange jelly... i was amazed on how they are able to make this dessert... it was contained in a real orange with real orange flesh... the jelly is all meshed up but the sweetness is just nice! haha... :P
then we went to the Central for a bit of shopping... bought a red bag... a bit heart pain... but i was a bit happier after the purchase... :) retail therapy...
the main damage of the day = SE K810i!
my heart pain until dun know how to describe... :S but i really need a phone... sigh... dun think i had spent so much in one day b4 wor! :)
have to strave for a few days le... :(
finally gt my lazy bum out of the house for these few days... it actually does feel quite good to be outside... at least i do feel happier... :)
Thursday, October 11
*sigh...*
we always see one side of the story and started assuming the rest with our own imgination... but we failed to realise in most cases that it is not what we tot it would... only then, we will look back and think how foolish we are... this is what happened to me recently... gt into the think too much symptom... only after ppl start to tell me things from another angle, that it strike me things were not what it seem to be... :S
no lessons today.. guess will just spend on mugging and meeting FYP prof... i hope i dun get distracted...
Wednesday, October 10
*slacking...*
die, die, die.... keep slacking and slacking... not even keeping to the schedule that I had came up with.... sigh... I am so screwed liao... :( can someone help to knock some sense into me!? *banging head into wall* feeling very gulity le... sigh...
yest had the courage to talk to him... dun know why i dun have the courage to talk to him, probably scared that he sort of ignore me? i just wanna be frens only, nothing much... mayb it is still too diff at this point in time... i really hope we can be like talking frens in the future...
Monday, October 8
*a gift*
Front
Back
Thanks Kerry for this sweet gesture...
A great fren to have around... :)
Thanks for the constant cheering up...
Thanks for the constant encouragement...
Thanks for the dinner and supper rides...
I know no amount of thanks can be enough to thank you for all you have done for me these few days...
just wanna say "Frens forever!" :)
Sunday, October 7
*HI!*
hihi! i'm back!! haha... so long never update le! was supposed to update about my taiwan trip... but all the pics are not with me now... shall do that when i have them... :P let's just say i had a not too bad trip... pleased with my purchases... :)
had my TCM exams on 2rd... sigh... din managed to finish studying, even though i stayed up the whole night to study for it... i'm so dead lor! let's just hope for the best! *crossing my fingers* can everyone else join in the praying???
even though, TCM finished le, i seem to have a lot things to do too! haha... but not in the acedamic aspect though... *bleah* i need to settle down and start to catch up with other modules le... can someone knock some sense of urgency into me??? i just like slacking all day long sia! this is so bad!!! i never even watch my constant dose of drama lor! dun know y i so busy!!!
wanted to do some work today... but end up slacking at home... sigh... but i enjoyed the show that i watched this afternoon, "a walk to remember"... it was quite engaging and it touched my heart... suddenly gt a lot of tots passing thr my mind... sigh... snapped out of the emo state by slping... nevertheless, nice show!
I NEED A DECENT PHONE SOON! I mean real soon! :(
